Examining the Life You’re Still Living

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WHEN SURVIVAL IS NO LONGER ENOUGH

There comes a moment when the soul grows tired of repeating what it never understood.
A moment when the heart whispers, “There has to be more than this.”
A moment when survival stops being noble and starts being exhausting.

That moment is the doorway to what I call the living autopsy.

A living autopsy is not about death.
It is about truth, the kind of truth that frees you, heals you, and restores you to the version of yourself God originally designed.

It is the spiritual and emotional examination of your life while you are still alive, so you can understand:

• what shaped you
• what wounded you
• what you believed because of it
• how those beliefs shaped your patterns
• and how those patterns shaped your relationships

This chapter is your invitation to stop surviving and start understanding.

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WHAT A LIVING AUTOPSY IS

A living autopsy is the courageous act of looking inward with God, not to condemn yourself, but to understand yourself.

It is the moment you stop saying:

“This is just who I am.”

And begin saying:

“This is who I became, and I can become someone new.”

A living autopsy is not about blame.
It is about clarity.
It is not about shame.
It is about revelation.
It is not about reliving pain.
It is about reclaiming power.

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THE FOUR LAYERS OF YOUR STORY

Every person is shaped by four layers.
These layers explain why you think, react, love, fear, and choose the way you do.

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EVENTS: What Happened to You

These are the moments that marked you:

• childhood experiences
• betrayals
• abandonment
• rejection
• heartbreak
• losses
• disappointments
• trauma

These events are the roots of your story.

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INTERPRETATIONS: What You Believed Because of It

Events don’t shape you.
The meaning you attached to them does.

This is where the wound becomes a belief:

• “I’m not enough.”
• “People always leave.”
• “Love is dangerous.”
• “I have to do everything myself.”
• “I’m too much.”
• “I’m unworthy.”

These beliefs become your internal script.

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PATTERNS: How You Started Behaving

Beliefs become behaviors.

Because you believed something, you began to:

• shut down
• accuse
• overthink
• over-give
• avoid intimacy
• sabotage relationships
• distrust everyone
• repeat your parents’ patterns

These patterns become your default settings.

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FRUIT: What Your Life Looks Like Now

This is the evidence of the wound:

• repeated cycles
• broken communication
• emotional distance
• trust issues
• fear of vulnerability
• spiritual battles
• relational chaos

This is not who you are.
This is who you became because of what you survived.

A living autopsy helps you separate the two.

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THE LIVING AUTOPSY PROCESS

This is the part you do.
This is where transformation begins.

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INVITE GOD INTO THE PROCESS

Sit still. Breathe. Say:

“Lord, search me. Show me what I’ve normalized that is not from You.”

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IDENTIFY THE KEY EVENTS THAT SHAPED YOU

Write down the major moments that marked you:

• first heartbreak
• first betrayal
• first abandonment
• first time you felt invisible
• first time you felt unsafe

These are the turning points.

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IDENTIFY WHAT YOU BELIEVED BECAUSE OF THOSE EVENTS

For each event, write:

“Because of this, I started to believe…”

These beliefs became your internal narrative.

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IDENTIFY THE PATTERNS THAT GREW FROM THOSE BELIEFS

For each belief, write:

“Because I believed this, I started to…”

These patterns became your behavior.

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IDENTIFY THE FRUIT IN YOUR LIFE TODAY

Ask yourself:

• Where do I keep ending up?
• What cycles keep repeating?
• What triggers keep showing up?

This is the evidence.

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COMPARE YOUR BELIEFS TO GOD’S TRUTH

Make two columns:

Column A: My Belief
Column B: God’s Truth

This is the exchange.

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RELEASE THE LIE AND RECEIVE THE TRUTH

Write:

• “I release the belief that ______.”
• “I reject the pattern of ______.”
• “I receive the truth that ______.”
• “I choose to respond with ______.”

This is the transformation.

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CHOOSE ONE NEW ACTION FORWARD

Not everything.
Just one.

This is the application.

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REPEAT FOR EACH WOUND

Healing is a journey of awareness.

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WALK IN YOUR NEW IDENTITY

This is where restoration becomes real.

You begin to:

• respond differently
• love differently
• communicate differently
• trust differently

This is the fruit of healing.

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CLOSING

A living autopsy is not about reliving your pain.
It is about reclaiming your power.

It is not about blaming your past.
It is about understanding it.

It is not about who hurt you.
It is about who you are becoming.

This is the work that breaks generational cycles.
This is the work that restores covenant.
This is the work that heals homes.

This is the work of the Pocketbook of Grace.

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JOURNAL‑STYLE WORKSHEET

The Living Autopsy: Personal Self‑Examination Pages

Use these pages slowly.
Let God guide you.
Write honestly.
Write without judgment.
Write to understand, not to blame.

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1. INVITATION

Prayer:
“Lord, search me. Reveal what I’ve normalized. Walk with me through this.”

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2. EVENTS: What Happened to Me

List the major moments that shaped you:

–

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3. INTERPRETATIONS: What I Believed Because of It

For each event, complete:

Event:
Because of this, I started to believe…

• About myself:
• About others:
• About God:

(Repeat for each event)

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4. PATTERNS: How I Started Behaving

Because I believed this, I started to…
–

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5. FRUIT: What My Life Looks Like Now

Where do I see this belief showing up today?

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6. TRUTH EXCHANGE

My Belief:
God’s Truth:

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7. RELEASE + RECEIVE

I release the belief that:
I reject the pattern of:
I receive the truth that:
I choose to respond with:

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8. ONE NEW ACTION

This week, I will…

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9. NOTES + REVELATIONS

Use this space for anything God reveals: